Found the test that Tia so kindly reminded me about.  Holy crow I had to scroll back a long ways to find the link.  here I am...  it says I'm a cautious thinker... hmmm... I'm going to have to think about that.

Well shit....  so it's been a year and here I am again.  I'm not sure how many times I have said it in the past but I am really bad at blogging.   So brief overview of the last year...   almost exactly a year, wow just realized that.  I still work at MCR although I have a new job since I wrote last and am now over resident services and admissions.  Tia is now a mother and works at MCR as a NOC (night) CNA, Todd is working on a medical retirement after yet more surgeries and fake parts and Colt is currently living in North Dakota working in the oil fields.    Did you catch that Tia is now a mother part?  Well you should have if you didn't because it is a big thing in our little world.  young Festus was born on my birthday just like the fantastically well behaved young man he is :-)    He is a fantastic addition to our family and while I may not think it was the best timing in the world I wouldn't change it for anything.  He is 9 months old today and he is into EVERYTHING.  He moves at warp speed I swear and he isn't a bit spoiled...  HAHAHAHHAHAHAH   ok, maybe a little spoiled.   No matter how craptastic of a day I might have had at work he greets me with a smile when I walk in the door and things look just a bit brighter in the world.   

Well seriously, I'm still boring as all get out and have no exciting things to post so I shall say goodbye for now.

See ya all next year!  ha ha ha

AA???

So I just looked at a couple of past posts and decided I probably should update on the whole crying scale, first day of my past life..  etc subjects.   For awhile there I did really good.  Ate better at first but not much else.  Then I did even better ate better and exercised!  woot woot.  that little point went on for about 3 or 4 months and things were good.   then summer came and I was burnt out from being good and I fell off the wagon for a couple weeks.  gained a couple of pounds but nothing serious.  started eating better most of the time just not as good as I should be , but not exercising nearly as much as I should.   I go out and garden and walk around and say I got my 45 minutes in, which is true, but its just not doing much for me.   I am still currently down about 45 pounds from where I was on January 3rd.  so this is good.   I need to be down another 50 pounds however so I need to get motivated again.  Being motivated is hard for me this time of year.  This I shall work on...  starting tomorrow.  hahahahahahaha

Things in our world...

Well this will be a wordy little thing because it has been a long time...

what's been going on with us. 

Tia came home from college the first part of May and will be having a little boy bambino named Festus (hee hee hee) sometime the end of November first of December.  He is officially due on my birthday and I think they should just stick to that plan.  So far he seems to be a stubborn child, first we had to chase the heartbeat and then he tried not to show us any of the goods on the ultrasound, but alas  we "neeked" up on him.   Of course he could have just been yanking our chain and is really a her!  oh my!  there are entirely too many baby boy things currently residing in that bedroom to have him come out a her!  Tia is currently working, hopefully for the next couple months, at the care center in the kitchen and we will have to see what transpires after the arrival of little Festus  (Martian Festus?? as she was abducted by aliens and came back to earth pregnant from what I've been told). 

Colt graduated from High School in May and left for Logan in July.  He is currently rapidly passing off welding certifications to finish the welding program  and then begin the machinist program.  He seems to spend his free time bow-fishing and exploring on his motorcycle.  I'm not sure what he is going to do with himself when the weather turns horrid.

Todd is still broken but hobbling off to work every day.  He told me in 22 months he was retiring, today he informed me that anytime after November of this year he could retire! :-0   I'm holding out for the 22 months, I just wish his hip would cooperate more. 

As for me,  I go to work, I come home.  I weed my garden, I water my garden.  Currently I am in the process of trying to get ready for the State Fair.  It always seems like such a good idea to enter all these critters until it comes time to get them ready to go...  5 clipped, 19 to go :-0    I am excited to spend some time at the fair again. 

Guess that is all for now.  I won't say I'll post again soon.  but maybe I will... maybe I wont. 

Jumping Jehosaphats (I wonder how you really spell that)...  it has been a long time.  I shall not guarantee it won't be just as long til the next post.    HAHAHAHAHAHAH

Just as I thought...

I made the scale cry. :-0 I've been avoiding the thing, can't avoid the fact I feel like crap though. So me and the scale are back on speaking terms... well if it ever stops crying. At least I'm not going to just avoid it anymore. I may however take up crying with it.

Today's eating is going well. I had toast with 1/2 oz of peanut butter on it... Tia, I'm eating your peanut butter thingies! :-0 Figured that way I would be less prone to add "extra". So my two slices of 9 grain bountiful baskets bread with my 1/2 oz peanut butter packet divided between the two has GOT to be better then my normal morning breakfast of two scrambled eggs with cheese and 2 slices of buttered toast. right? Maybe I should look into the factuality of that statement, instead of just assuming in my head. I will note, that I was perfectly happy with that for breakfast. Of course now I just keep thinking about food. Not even hungry, just want to eat it cause the possibility is out there. This is something I know I need to work on, eating when not hungry just because its there. Ahhhhh this is like AA, or what I assume AA would be like as I've never been there. confessions confessions confessions.

Oh yes, last night as I climbed into bed I remembered something else I need to work on. Going to bed at a decent hour. Yep, that definately needs some work. I hate getting into bed until I am so exhausted that I know I will have a chance of falling asleep. I need to find a way to be able to shut my mind off earlier. I think I will add melatonin to my shopping list.

sooooo.....

Long time, no type. just call me a slacker. It's all good I can handle it. Besides it's true so ehh, whats a person to do.

So, it is Sept 20, 2011 for at least another half hour, it is also the last day of the past of my life.... don't get your knickers in a knot (if you ever read this... TIA! ha, since your the only one who ever even contemplates reading this) I said past of my life, not rest of my life, or life period. Tomorrow, is the first day of the rest of my life. of course Tomorrows are ALWAYS the first days of the rest of your life, but I need to figure out my life. What am I doing to do with myself for the next 35 years? Will I live that long? I truly need to do something to get healthier... hell my blood pressure alone is enough to kill a person, not to mention the rest of the unhealthy issues I have going on.

So here's whats gonna happen, I need to own up to the fact that I need to change. I need to find a way to get some freaking willpower cause I don't have any! Not sure how I'm going to go about that yet. I need to hold myself accountable somehow. I'm going to start by confessing my transgressions here if I don't tow the line. My aim is to make a few small changes at a time and not completely beat myself up and then give up over falling of the wagon. When I say small... I mean small. I already know I have no willpower and I know that if I set my standards for myself to high I will fail, so I need to come up with a way to set reasonable goals. there might be a lot of stumbling going on for awhile, but hopefully there will be some progress.

Starting tomorrow, I am going to start laying off some of the bad things. My first aim is to just shoot for smaller meals and less "crap" and weaning myself from the fine lovely beverage Monster... mmmmm.... monster. I also aim to add 15 minutes of some sort of exercise a day. I will take the fat brown dog for a walk.. or ride the bike.. or play DDR! ahhhhh I used to love to play DDR. I will face the scale in the morning and go from there. I will try to make updates throughout the week and confess my transgressions... oh the optimism. That SHOULD have read "Celebrate my accomplishments", but I am just not feeling it yet. Come Monday or Maybe Tuesday since it IS Tuesday now, I will post a real update. and we'll see how it goes.

After I get this little bit of hell underway, my next thing is to figure out what I am going to do about needing a job for the next 35+ years. Doh!

On that note, I am outta here!